Sunday, July 10, 2011

HE is still teaching me.

So...I didn't post at all over my past year of teaching. :) I never would've guessed how time consuming and just plain exhausting it was to teach. But even with all of the work, God used this time to grow me as a teacher and continued molding my philosophies, prayer life and PATIENCE. 1 Corinthians 13 says that "love is patient, love is kind," these are words that I had to pray continually. Believe me, satan wanted nothing more than for me to snap at the kids, get angry, and lose control. However, God has called me to live a different life. To choose God over the attacks of the devil is never easy and I wasn't perfect. Just because I was tired, or sick or in a bad mood did not mean that I was able to slack off. I would even tell the kids. "Remember, I do not have patience naturally and I have to pray for it." That usually helped them and me regain focus. After struggling for a month to adjust I quickly realized that I had not given my classroom fully over to God. I was still trying to maintain some control. Just as a double minded man will fall, I could tell that having a double minded classroom would not work either. I could not handle all of the variables of my job on my own. He is in control of my classroom just as much as He is in control of my life and to hold anything back from Him is like a slap in the face. I wanted Him to use me and get all of the glory. I didn't know that there was a test looming. Shortly after getting a grasp on my classroom and getting used to a schedule, I was called into an emergency meeting about budget cuts. I was informed that I would no longer have my job after this year. God is so good and the first words out of my mouth were "I'm going to enjoy what I have now." Trust me, that is not an easy thing for me to say. My insides were screaming (I JUST FIGURED OUT HOW TO JUGGLE ALL OF THIS WITH GOD AND NOW ITS ONLY TEMPORARY?). But the great thing about God is that He can give us a peace that surpasses all understanding, even that of my own. As time went on it took 3 months to hear whether or not I would have my job. I continued to pray over that time, that no matter where God wanted me I would go. Funny thing is, I think that all God wanted out of this was to recognize my life should always be that way. Just because I am a teacher, doesn't mean God's will for my life will never change. I need to always seek His will and never get complacent. I used a lot of bible verses to help my students and even got the opportunity to pray for one of my students whose mother was sick. I will never know the impact I had on these students but I will never forget the lessons God taught me and the wonderful students He chose to use. Since God has commissioned me for one more year of teaching, I will take everything I learned to impact the next bunch of God's children positively for Christ.